Life with Asperger's Syndrome can be very confusing. Many days, Caleb is very high functioning and you would never expect that there is something different about the wiring in his brain. Other days, it's quite obvious that this child has some real issues.

Caleb continues to mature and grow and his bad days are few and far between now. However, one bad day in particular always comes to mind when I think back in time for an example of Caleb's bad days. It must have been about 3 years ago. He was about 11 years old and everything, and I mean everything, had been going bad that afternoon. Add to it that I was on my high horse (not exactly sure of the reason but probably something to do with Mike being in Iraq I'm sure) and that I was meeting out direction and commands to everyone who would listen, and you soon realize that nothing good could come of the situation. Eventually Caleb reached the melting point of having too many directions thrown at him at one time and his wires pretty much got fried.

I remember him distinctly walking up the stairs to do something I had told him to do while I was still dishing out more commands and he just lost it. All control was tossed out the window as he screamed "Dammit, woman!" at the top of his voice! In a flash, all of the other children scattered faster than a car traveling on the autobahn. "Oh my!!" was the only thing registering in my brain for several seconds! The look on his face was priceless. Seeing it, I instinctively knew that Edvard Munch must have used a child with Asperger's to create his famous painting, The Scream. I witnessed that stricken look of horror on my stairs as Caleb shrunk into a ball on the stairs and started bawling. He knew he had crossed a barrier with disrespect that should have never in all that is holy been dared to be crossed.  

There could be no punishment dished out this day. I had exasperated my child and I knew it.  I am commanded not to do that just as much as he is commanded to honor me as a parent.  I sat beside Caleb on the stairs and we both cried and held on to each other for comfort. I sought his forgiveness as he continued to say "I'm so sorry" through his tears.

Everything stopped that day. The chores were put on a back burner. We ordered out for dinner and we sat together as a family and watched a movie and played games. There are always things to accomplish but there are some things that are just stopping points. This moment was one of them. We all needed to regroup and put each other first.

As a parent of a special needs child I have learned that I must command authority and respect. I can not let my child use his diagnosis as an excuse to misbehave on a daily basis. I see that all to often in society and I do not want that to happen within my own family. However, I also realize that there will be some days that are just bad days with wrenches thrown into the mix that make everything go cattywompus. Unfortunately, I realize that sometimes it is of my own making and I have to correct myself in order to correct my children, especially Caleb.

I would never exchange Caleb for a different child if given the opportunity. He is the blessing that God gave to our family and there has never been a day that I thought I could live without him. That thought actually brings tears to my eyes! There is not another child in this world who can make the sound effects he can make (think cross between any of George Lucas' characters and Rowan Atkinson ). There is not another child who can give me hugs the way he does. And, yes, there is not another child who can stop me in my tracks with the things he says... good or bad! My life has been made extra special by the son God gave me. I thank God for His most generous blessing each and every day!

What are some life lessons you have learned from having a special needs child? I encourage you to thank God everyday for the blessing you have been given...

Sallie

I'm afraid of painting furniture. There, I've said it. I have everything I need. I even have the garage prepped to do the deed. But, I feel like I'm gonna break out in hives or a cold sweat every time I have a free moment to paint. What's up with that?!

Is there a name for it? Perhaps paintaphobia? Should I be on drugs? Is there a cure? Am I destined to never get my stuff painted and my house finished like I want so that I can be excited for company to come over? My heart is palpitating just thinking about it.

I mean, it's not like I've never painted my furniture before because I have. Several times. I wonder if living in military housing for F-O-R-E-V-E-R has diluted the creative, painted furniture sensitive side of my brain. Please, say it isn't so!

Maybe the fear is more in the color choices I've made. Or the style I'm going for. Painting things a white, distressed, antiqued, shabby chic sort of finish wasn't too hard. Of course, it doesn't hurt that you feel sort of like you can't really screw up with that style choice either. Pretty much anything goes. To a degree.

But this time I want something smoother. Elegant. Stylish, even. Maybe I'm afraid of taking the plunge. Maybe I'm afraid that once I move over to the dark side of elegance that I won't be able to move back to the side I love. Farmhouse style... country style... casual style. Maybe I'm afraid I can't mix the two together and still have that great eclectic look that we've always managed to achieve. Maybe I'm afraid I'll like it.

Whatever the reason might be, I have to get over this fear and just do it. I mean, good gracious me, people, I've even cleaned in my free time to avoid this job! Enough procrastinating already. It has to be done!

Pray for me. I might just come out the other side a changed woman!

Visit Rachel Anne's Home Sanctuary to join other Company Girls for coffee this week by clicking here. Now, there's a gal who isn't afraid of painting. She's so unafraid that she had her head in the clouds this last week. Go take a look and see what I mean :-)

Sallie

Mike and I went hiking for nearly an hour and a half on Friday. We wanted to scout a few areas first by ourselves plus Mike was in a PTSD twitch mode and needed some time out. He is recovering but there are still some days where he just gets overloaded and needs a break. Today was one of those days :-| On Saturday we will be taking the whole family with us. And on Sunday afternoon. And Monday. We are really trying to kick into high gear with the hiking. It's a "brand new world" for us here in North Carolina and we can't wait to discover all the hidden treasures we can find!    

We love taking pictures of E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G but are still getting used to the macro settings on our HD camera. It is an aiptek action HD-DV 1080P. Many of our hiking pictures were pretty fuzzy but this one came out just perfect!! I love it!

What are your plans for the Columbus Day weekend? Why not go on a bit of an adventure and discover a brand new world?! If you aren't sure about where to go in your own backyard (town, county, state) then why not check out the Make Tracks website? Get outdoors for a while and just remember to have fun while you are at it :-)

Sallie

My son, keep my words; lay up within you my commandments [for use when needed] and treasure them. Keep my commandments and live, and keep my law and teaching as the apple (the pupil) of your eye. Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.

Sallie

We are enjoying the nice autumn weather around here. I keep seeing little bits of red peaking out of the trees and I can't wait to see fall in its full glory amidst the trees.

We have been doing a little harvest decorating and I thought I'd share the photos. Enjoy!

This is our small dining room tablescape. Everything was so something that I already had at the house, found free in nature, was a thrift store find, or Dollar General inexpensive. My most favorite part is the glittery pumpkin sitting in a bed of spanish moss (that I dried in my microwave) on top of the small green urn. Definitely unique! I love that kind of decorating!

This is what greets you when you arrive at our home. We snagged the orange berry branches from a bush up the street (public property I promise)and I bought the wreath at the Officers Wives Club Shop. It was so inexpensive and so BIG. Again, I love it :-)

Are you feeling fall yet? What's your favorite part?

Sallie